Why do I?

For the most part I do not care about what others think of me. If someone starts to demean my intelligence I usually just start playing the part of the dumb yokel because now it is a game. I don't care how much I eat, even as others tell me that I will be sorry when I am older. What they do not understand is that when I am older more than likely I will have slowed down a little bit and my eating habits will follow. I don't care that others do not push themselves as hard as I do and then make fun of me for it. Calling me insane, it is not insane, it is not a workout addiction, it is a work ethic thing. Similar to how I have not flipped anyone off since I learned what it was, Dad told me not to ever do that again, he als0 told me to work as hard as you can every time you are asked to. It is not to be better than anyone else it is just being the way that I am. Until recently I had never cared what I was wearing. The top of the pile was good enough for me. That is still there but I do have to dress up a bit for school.

If I really do not care about what people think of me then why is it that I think that it would be not a good idea to go to a gym and talk to women. I try to put myself into their shoes and I know that I would not want some idiot coming over to me interrupting my workout in a sad attempt to build a relationship out of a brief conversation. So this would lead me to just not have the conversation, save myself and her the awkward conversation. David's friend James said something that stuck with me through the night, "The cold pickup is hard. I have no idea what to say."

I guess it all comes down to confidence. In all other aspects of my life I am supremely confident in my abilities. Athletics, never had a problem, school was a breeze, teaching just sort of flows naturally, driving in bad conditions, my health, I always knew that it would be alright. In everything that I have read and everything that people have told me women look for confidence in a man. Well I have it, but I guess not in the right area. That might have been part of the education that I missed in high school and college. Not the schoolin' but the education. -MT

Well lets see I go through high school so focused on wrestling that I really did not notice much else there. College I decided to reinvent myself, become outgoing, talk to everyone, and then six days later I have a girlfriend who was a bit of a shut in, allowing me to be a shut in, six months later we are engaged. Another part of the education that I had missed, don't let them walk all over you. You have an opinion too, it is a valid opinion. Don't be afraid to drop the nuke card if it is not feeling right. Remember that in a relationship there is give and take, if you are giving and she is telling you that you need to stop taking so much, you might need to re-evaluate your situation. Sometimes having an impartial outsider listen and comment on "disagreements" will help both parties. (And help one party actually stand up for himself. Thanks Amanda)

But again I find myself ignoring this education because of wrestling. I am wanting to go to the national tournament in Las Vegas which means much working out, and, "Women weaken legs." -Mickey. I guess with no money, no place to live, and wrestling I have enough excuses to avoid this topic until at least summer.